good old days

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One Response to good old days

  1. BA Primary 208 - University of Roehampton says:

    We think that you use a wide range of punctuation and adverbs to help to build your story.

    We like the way you build up the story that is then broken by the use of speech. This helps add to the tension of the story.

    Maybe you could use shorter sentences to help with the tension, as we feel your first sentence is a little too long.

    BA Primary 208 – University of Roehampton

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